I got to thinking about IRC some time ago, and how much creative time we spent solving the fundamental problem of how, exactly, to use the internet without needing some sort of middleman, like a crazy person hosting a server for no clear reason, so that we could all communicate together.

That and designing the thing so that even if the hardware in your closet got hammered with a bajillion visits it wouldn’t stutter because it was all too light weight for that. But also, fuck no I would rather throw myself down the stairs than arrange it so that I have to maintain it a lot. That type of thinking defined an era, and that’s why zombo.com still works.

I have to put more maintenance into my Gmail account than the zombo guy does into the entire website, is what I’m saying. Return to monke, is what I’m saying.

Sorry, I haven’t been stealing from Tumblr like I should.

God I love shitty cosplay that still works.

Somebody shakes their head and says something about milk and pizza

He’s a survivor. He had a hunch and started walking casually toward the mountains, never to be seen again.

Please note that the prompt says “queens of England” very clearly, which turns it into a glorified Google image search, so the results are unacceptable trash, and vaguely leftist language about people being angry for the lack of racism are your problem, only. Fuck off, troll.

The real issue is that even with a handholding, direct and easy prompt, the tech cannot simply hand over pictures, even generated ones to avoid copyright issues, that come from easily discovered answers on Wikipedia and who knows how many other credible sources. The lineage of the British Royal Family is all but open-source data - probably is, literally - and your mom can probably name three Queens offhand though she’s Canadian. This thing completely ate shit on an easy, easy prompt.

I don’t know how many times now I’ve seen some YouTuber use “evil Jerome Powell” as a prompt for a thumbnail, and get a clear picture of him complete with devil horns, copyright be damned, so what the f? The AI isn’t this stupid, that means they’re nerfing it and screwing it up. You best believe they’re still selling it, though.

What other results will it comically fuck up, but you don’t have the knowledge to critique? You won’t see the results, either, somebody else will use them to judge your resume; IS using them, now. Fucking lazy hiring managers are going to just plug your name into this thing and ask for a synopsis of your life so they don’t have to work. It will just fill in missing information with lies, and they’ll eat it up. I guess you shot two people a couple of years ago and didn’t know about it. I wonder why you didn’t get the job?

People have been crazy dumb with this AI, meaning young, smart, tech-savvy people with heavy internet backgrounds who should know better than to trust keep treating it like an oracle, because they have some weird blind spot about this technology. Ignorant executives who think math is for slurs are going to make it do everything.

They’re going to use this technology to decide who gets an apartment, who gets arrested, and a bunch of other shit, save your leftism for that.

The stinky back of that poor tiger

The only time I get 10 hours and wake up tired is after a lot of drinking, so maybe you have other issues.

Try out Shreddit, it’s a web app for exactly this. It even lets you filter by post karma so you can keep your hits. I’ve never used it but that’s the name that came up over on Reddit from everyone talking about the announcement.

This announcement is just “oh by the way, the horse is now out of the barn. He left like 10 years ago but this is the announcement.”

Shout out to whoever dismissed the first AI writings with “It’s like a perfect Redditor. Totally confident and completely full of shit, doesn’t even know that it’s lying.”

That doesn’t happen by accident. That happens when everyone was already scraping the shit out of the site, at the very least.

This show is going to be a huge hit with line cook babydaddies.

This sounds like the battery and the charger’s problem to handle, not mine.

All this tech, all this automation for every damn thing, and people keep coming at me like I’m supposed to do everything manually with my fingers and eyes and maybe an alarm or something to keep me on schedule. No. Stop it.

Make the charger handle it, or shut up. Make the phone, the charger, and the battery handle it together, you know, with digital automation. Do not even mention it to me.

So are they aware that they’re trying to shame a joke account that’s already doing a bit?

Do they think they’re winning? Are they in on the bit? What sort of cataclysm has to happen for Twitter people to wake up and go “oh my god, I WAS THE ASSHOLE THIS ENTIRE TIME, WHAT AM I DOING HERE”?

I’m glad I get to wipe my ass with what’s left of them without having to touch their vile community, I’ll call that a win.

So what’s the verdict, are the electric unicycles cool? Have they broken the curse? They do look cool, and you better be wearing the full motorcycle getup if you know what’s good for you, because they’re fast as f too.

That’s my favorite Pixies album

It’s been very strange. When I was a child in school I was not well liked, I was fat neckbeard with no internet because late 80s. Truly I was a sad pile. They called me all manner of hateful things, but it never even occurred to them to call me short, at 5’7".

I rarely feel “short”, only average. Most men seem to be around my height. Some minority of men are taller. I still manage to tower over many women, because women be small, yo. A “tall” girl is roughly my height, so they’re either at eye level or shorter, with the occasional very tall woman in the mix.

I’m tall enough that other people ask for assistance with things on high shelves on a regular enough basis, mostly women.

There is a DRASTIC difference between how the world treats my height versus how the internet shitbag community does. Go figure, abusive people are abusive.

I can only pinpoint the 2000s, and online dating profiles where you can sort by height, plus many women having a height fetish in the exact same way that men will ask people their bra size, and the continuing popularity of the NBA, plus women wanting to have sex with the players, plus their truly freakish heights throwing off the populist curve so that anybody under 6’0 is teeny tiny. Somebody is gonna start squeaking about “6 foot is average” so sure, chief, you win. But there was a time when I just wasn’t particularly tall. Suddenly I am perceived as an actual midget.

It’s just another example of the way people constantly try to find excuses to treat you like shit over just about anything they can think of, it shows how they’re constantly inventing that. It’s one of God’s little reminders to not worry what happens to them.

Yeah, she’s spiritual. Good thing none of that is up to you.

Sharks have flooded Shark Infested Waters with shark asshole stink but this time the asshole stink is AI generated and Taylor Swift has a billion dollars for lawyers.

That’s what you get for being a queen

Turns out you aren’t driven by fear and desperation enough sorry