All of this makes me feel a lot more comfortable with the idea of starting E. Even a little excited.
I have to move to a more welcoming place first, but I’m hoping to do that by this summer. When I do, I’ll look for a therapist and doctor who can help me get started.

Thank you for replying!

Have you noticed much change in your upper body strength? Or have your current T levels helped keep it up? I’ve never been that strong, even with testosterone helping me, so the thought of being even physically weaker had me a bit nervous. I know I can workout to mitigate that, but that isn’t always feasible to do. How long have you been taking them so far? I’m also taking finasteride for my hair, but I’ve been on it for almost 18 months. My hair is still shedding a bit, but I can see regrowth starting.

Those androgynizing effects sound really appealing. Those would give me the big happy.
As for sexual functionality, that doesn’t sound too bad. Now that I think about it, I remember reading in another post someone suggested topical T-gel to apply down there. I believe trans men (and even some cis women) use it go develop theirs. So it makes sense that AMAB’s could use it to maintain functionality. I’ll have to dig into that.

Those mental effects also sound awesome. I’ve always struggled with interpreting my emotions and maybe this is why.
Lady-O’s are definitely something I’ve been trying to achieve but I’ve never been successful. Maybe going on E will be the ticket?

You can take E without anti-androgens? I thought E always had to be paired with some sort of T-blocker. How has your body and mind responded to it so far?
I’m asking mainly because I really want to have more feminine features, but there are still some masc features I want to keep that taking T-blockers would get rid of (my functionality down there, for example). So the thought of going on HRT makes me apprehensive. But if I could keep them, I would feel a lot more comfortable moving forward.
This also has me wondering if I’m trans or more likely enby/genderfluid.

For me, it’s the clothing I wear. Like when I worked out, I used to wear standard masc workout clothes. But once I discovered sporty fem fits that I look good in, I loathe whenever I have to wear my masc clothing. I like how I look with fem clothing so much more.
I also started growing my hair out and once I saw how I looked with it, I cannot go back to short hair anymore. The simple thought of going back to short hair makes me feel so dysphoric. Plus the compliments I get about my curls which certainly helps.